Right place at the right time

I just happened to be at the right place at the right time

Double the insult

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!”

The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”

The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

Moral: You can't always trust person sit next to you.

Hell

A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that it is possible to choose one of many different sections, each having management and manning from a different country. He decides he'll pick the least painful to spend his eternity. He goes to the German Hell and asks, "What do they do here?"
He is told "first they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day".

The man does not like the sound of that at all so he moves on. He checks out the American Hell as well as the Russian Hell and window shops at many more.

He discovers that they are all similar to the German hell.

Then he comes to the PAKISTANI Hell and finds that there is a long line of people waiting to get in.

Amazed, he asks, "What do they do here?"

He is told "first they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. The PAKISTANI devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day".

"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells so why are there so many people suffering in line to get in?" asks the man.

"Oh, mostly there is no electricity, so the electric chair does not work. The nails were paid for but never supplied, so the bed is comfortable to sleep on. And the PAKISTANI devil used to be a government servant, so he comes in, signs his time sheet and goes back home for whatever."